THE WINDOW

05Feb 02 ,2010.

THE WINDOW

I flip pages in front of me on my desk and also scanning words in my head which were buzzing and were trying to break out to get into this wonderful world of a book. To assemble my thoughts I stood in front of my window, a small whole, which acts as a passage way in between me and outside world. It has always been a medium to relax my mind and soul too and also a thing which helps me in gathering or taking my imagination to another level where I weave some kind of story or anything.

I would always feel the power resting in me to see through everything by just standing over their and looking or scanning the whole place with an intent eye and energy which can catch any movement or anything. It gave a different feel of everything and everyone below.

Those warm or cool breezes which escaped from the free and endless world gushed into my room through that window and touched me , making me to feel the rhythm and pace by which the life goes on. Those cool breezes fill my room with enigma and power sizzling through and within my body and restless enough to escape from me. I feel light and something heavy slowly slips from me as butter melts away when once dropped on heated pan with producing little foam which indicates my slowly raise of energy which is getting an outlet to come out.

When ever I peek through my window I’m staggered by the reality it shows . The reality consists of various things i.e., workers working in scorching sun for earning food on their plates and a teenager learning to drive her scooty while his brother behind her instructing to be calm and free while her parents and her kiddo brother clapping in excitement and imagining his turn to come soon and thinking of new ways to grow up soon ; and a mother working in her kitchen preparing meals with such love and also a stray dog trying to soak some sun by laying clumsily in the middle of the road and soon. It shows me poverty, hard work, love, support and many more things. This raises doubts beyond reasoning in my mind and heart. It also gives me pleasure of watching the nature being turned to different things , from a landscape or garden to a house or bungalow.

It was dead night and no noise to be heard as everyone was far asleep and dreaming big or getting scared and I was on my desk trying to put some words together to make some or any sense at all. The power got off as it usually happens and I got up irritated and started pacing forward and backward restlessly. I approached the window and opened it to cool myself with the cool breeze blowing outside my window. I was again struck by lightening of nature’s incredible view for which we run whole world for just one such moment of peace and to drink its boundless beauty and preserve it in our heart.

It was a dead night and the only dim light which was available was from the beautiful and alluring site of the celestial crescent moon which was winking at me and saying you and me are the only persons who are enjoying the incredible view in our approach. I was admiring the star lit sky and wondering it would have been more mesmerizing if it was polluted by the gases and heavy beamed lights and even though HE stands like omnipotent with charismatic, enigmatic and radiating an incredible energy like a king who lost his kingdom but still with holds that great vigor in him. The moment was like we are only two persons who were exchanging courtesies and also measuring each othe rjust like two unknown people who are watching and assessing one another while they are being introduced to each other. There was no need of words to be exchanged in-between them as their minds were enough to communicate. Meanwhile, the power comes again disturbing the aura of secrecy which couldn’t be understood in flooding lights.

I had one more indelible experience of imagining or in real of a man standing right opposite to my window and waiting patiently as a predator waits for his prey to come into right spot. When I opened my window something was wrong and I could feel chills running along my spine and cold sweat being formed and being dripped drop by drop. As I concentrate on finding the reason for such encounter, I get glimpse of shadow and get scared. The eyes of shadow watch me with such intensity like they are reading me or my thoughts. Those eyes were engaged and fixed upon me and were making me immovable while my brain was trying hard to make me shut the window but in vain. Suddenly I perspiring heavily and my clothes were stinking to my body though there were cold breeze running outside and inside too. Suddenly the feeling of safety and warmth returns to mind like a guardian angel was protecting me from that negative energy. I was dumbstruck to find myself in such situation and was feeling like abhorrent and obnoxious person and would never forget such thing in my life.

Days after days and seasons after seasons I lay on my bed with a pen and paper in my lap and trying hard to see beyond what’s normal and I was leading frustration, thwart and confront a dead end. I jerk up from my bed and reach the window in urgency and open the window. But my fate has fallen into such deep ocean where I wasn’t able to retrieve it back. I see a building in front of my window blocking me from my world of reality to live upon and despair was dragging me into a dark hole where I couldn’t find an escape. Now I stand their and grooming and also presuming about those days of tranquility and bliss while regret the present filled with misery and myOPEN WINDOW has turned down to a CLOSED WINDOW.

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